Going through police reports can be tedious. But sometimes such perusals show why committing crimes can be downright stupid. Or maybe it is the accused themselves who are, to quote my son's favorite movie character, Napoleon Dynamite -- an idiot! Take Wade Jared Murphy for instance. He was caught at the scene three hours later at the 7-Eleven in New Smyrna Beach with a no trespass warning in his pants pocket by the same cop. Or how about Corey Wilton Eichelberger who was rescued in the Indian River after breaking free and making the plunge while handcuffed behind his back.
We'll start with Mr. Murphy. As a precursor, the St. Augustine man is innocent until or unless proven guilty in a court of law. With that said, let's review the police report: Murphy, 35, was served a trespass warning at 1:17 a.m. Saturday, June 28, after police received a complaint he was loitering in the parking lot there. The officer returned at 4:49 a.m., and was hiding in the back of a white pick-up truck near the pumps. The vehicle was stopped in the 600 block of Pecan Street..
Officer Joseph Hanchard noted in his report, "I located the trespass warning in his in his front right pocket," adding, "I detected a strong odor of beverage."
This time, Murphy was given a ride straight to jail on charges of violating the trespass warning.
The second incident of note is laughable, but could have had tragic results for the accused who could have very well drowned.
New Smyrna Beach officer Michael Delehanty had quite an adventure during the night shift as well when he responded to a domestic violence call and placed Corey Wilton Eichelberger under arrest on North Peninsula when he suddenly broke free and ran a short distance while handcuffed from behind.
Delehanty wrote in his report: "As the defendant got to the river , he turned, stopped and looked at me."
Then he did what Delehanty could only figure someone totally idiotic would do: "He then jumped into the river. The defendant initially went under water."
So the cop acted on instinct and training. He striped down to his bare essentials and dove into the river.
Delehanty swam towards him while other officers contacted the Coast Guard and then caught up with him trying to hide under a dock near the 200 block of Spyglass Lane. Delehanty dragged him onto shore where he was transported to the Volusia County Branch Jail.
The cop noted the accused was intoxicated and learned why he tried fleeing: Eichelberger was wanted on warrants charging him with possession of methamphetamines and cultivating cannabis.
Eichelberger was charged by NSB police with felony fleeing. He was taken to Bert Fish Medical to make sure he was Ok and then to jail.
What else is there to say except to quote Napoleon Dynamite: "Idiot!"